Luke 5:3-10. Isaiah 6:1-8

In her book ‘“When “Spiritual but Not Religious” Is Not Enough,’ Lilian Daniel wrote:

When I meet a teacher I don’t feel the need to tell him that I always hated math. When I meet a chef I don’t need to tell her that I can’t cook. When I meet a clown I don’t need to tell him that I think clowns are all scary. No I keep that stuff to myself. But everybody loves to tell a minister what’s wrong with the church.

I certainly do relate to that, but even more than just telling me what’s wrong with the church, most people, upon knowing I am in the theology field, would tell me also what’s wrong with their spirituality, and why they chose to get away from the church or from God altogether. Mostly, it is that same feeling of inadequacy expressed by Peter in our gospel text.

I met a new group of friends called the Sacramento hikers. And somewhere on our 17 miles South Yuba trail, a guy asked me what I do for work, and when I said I’m a resident pastor, he immediately said: “Oh, my life is full of sin,” to which I replied: “well, mine too.”

It is funny how I automatically became to him a judge and God’s advocate. I am sure when he woke up that morning his first thoughts weren’t exactly “Oh my God, I am a sinner,” but suddenly that became a concern when he met someone he thought is “holier,” as if that’s a thing. It is also funny, that I did that too. I do not usually doubt my athletic abilities, but on that first hike with a group of professionals I secretly judged myself as a beginner who’s trying to keep up with the rest of the hikers, making excuses that I am taking photos whenever I stop for a minute to catch my breath.

The truth is, we constantly try to compare ourselves to others, especially when their capacities make us feel that we are inferior and cannot measure up.

Peter did that too. He should have been happy to have caught all that fish after a long, tiring, fruitless night. He should have been celebrating the great catch, but instead, he immediately acknowledges that what had just happened was greater than himself and his abilities; it was God’s doing, and there is no way he could measure up to that! “Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!” It is one of those moments when Peter actually gets it right. As if the presence of the Holy is a mirror that suddenly uncovers one’s deepest self to their own eyes. “Go away Lord, because I do not measure up!”

“Yes of course you don’t,” Jesus might have as well affirmed, “but it does not matter!” Because God isn’t really expecting you to. In fact there will never be a time when we can measure up to God. There will never be a time when we are perfect as we are. Think of your kids they didn’t turn out exactly what you wanted them to become but you love them anyway, just the way they are. God does the same with us. God loves us and accepts us just as we are, and meets us just where we are.

At the beginning of the story Jesus is the one who chose to get on Peter’s boat; he goes to meet Peter where he was, on the boat, in his familiar fishing world, and there on the boat reveals God’s glory to him. It is then that he realizes who he was, but also it is then and there that Jesus reassured him, that, as mediocre as he might think he was, he is still designated to do greater things. “Don’t be afraid; from now on I will make you fisher for people.”

Friends, if we keep trying to measure up to others, we will find a thousand things we are incapable of doing to say the least, and we could even get depressed. I remember when I was a teenager, I used to try so hard to measure up to the rest of the popular girls in my class, and that only made me more miserable and left me focusing on what I cannot do or be, and all the ways I do not measure up!

God knows who God created us to be and doesn’t want guilt or shame or fear or pride to interfere with that beautiful image of what God has for us, but wants us to step into God’s love and become our true selves: beloved children of God. It is then that our cry changes from: “Go away from me Lord” to “Here I am Lord, send me.”